“There’s a taboo around IVF. Many women go through it in silence, not wanting to talk about it. But I questioned—why should it be a taboo? It’s not anyone’s fault; it’s a medical condition,” shares Sharmeen Looi, co-founder of iMotorbike, about her deeply personal journey with in-vitro fertilization (IVF).
Sharmeen Looi is a dynamic entrepreneur who built her career with bold decisions and a calculated approach. Yet, one of her most defining journeys wasn’t in the boardroom, but in navigating the emotional, physical, and mental challenges of IVF.
Challenging the Stigma Around IVF
From a young age, Looi understood that fertility might be a challenge for her due to earlier health diagnoses. But she didn’t let this deter her. After marrying in 2020, she embarked on her IVF journey at the age of 34, in July 2023, with a methodical mindset. Looi was determined to do everything she could to improve her chances of success—adjusting her lifestyle, removing cysts, and consulting with specialists.
Despite being told that she only had one viable embryo, Looi’s persistence paid off when that single embryo led to a successful pregnancy, something her doctor called rare.
But the emotional and physical toll of IVF extended beyond the treatment itself. The silence surrounding fertility struggles, especially in the workplace, struck her deeply. She didn’t want to hide her experience but instead sought to make conversations about IVF more open and less stigmatized.
The Balancing Act of IVF and Work
Looi quickly realized that IVF was far more than just taking medications and injections. It required significant lifestyle changes, emotional focus, and consistent dedication. The process was all-encompassing—medication schedules, doctor’s appointments, and emotional fluctuations—all of which affected her work and daily routine.
Rather than keeping her IVF journey private, Looi made it a point to weave it into everyday conversations with friends, family, and colleagues. She sought to normalize the conversation about IVF and create a space where others could feel comfortable sharing their own struggles, free of fear or stigma.
The decision to be open about IVF wasn’t always easy. There was resistance, especially from older generations, who had advised her not to talk about her reproductive health, fearing it might affect her value in a marriage. But Looi dismissed these outdated views, being upfront with her husband about her fertility issues before they married, ensuring they were aligned on the matter. His support, she says, was invaluable during the IVF process.
Creating an Environment of Openness
Looi’s transparency about her IVF journey fostered stronger relationships with her colleagues. Rather than a formal announcement, she shared her experience in casual conversations, explaining the nature of the process and the lifestyle changes it required. She even shared moments where she had to step away for injections or medications during work hours, ensuring her team understood her needs.
This openness created an environment where others felt comfortable discussing their own challenges, whether personal or professional. Looi believes that sharing her story helped break down barriers and paved the way for more compassionate and understanding workplaces.
Resilience Through IVF: A Lesson in Determination
Looi’s IVF experience has also taught her invaluable lessons in resilience. She likens the process to running a startup: “Success depends on having the right team,” she says. Her medical team worked collaboratively with her, and she focused on her health to prepare her body for the IVF process.
Her advice to other women considering IVF is to take the first step. She understands that societal and family pressures can cause hesitation, but stresses that being open and proactive about fertility struggles makes a significant difference. IVF can be a lonely journey, but sharing your experience with a supportive network is crucial.
Above all, Looi advocates for self-compassion. “The hardest part was the emotional toll,” she admits. The hormonal treatments made her hyper-aware of every decision, but she has learned to forgive herself for the emotional moments and focus on the bigger picture.
Paving the Way for Future Conversations
Looi’s decision to share her IVF journey isn’t just about her—it’s about every woman who has silently struggled with fertility challenges. “Normalize talking about struggles,” she urges. “It helps break stigmas and allows others to learn from your journey.”
With women like Looi leading the way, the once-silent conversations surrounding IVF are transforming into powerful dialogues that can change perspectives, workplace cultures, and ultimately, lives. By speaking out, Looi is helping to create a future where fertility struggles are no longer taboo but are understood and embraced with compassion and support.
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